A "Kimmie-Life" Update!

Hi internet peoples! Just wanted to update you all on the crazy changes that have been happening recently in my life.

So as you may know I was attending a 4-year private university and paying for it basically on my own. However, it got to the point where I couldn't afford $400/a month payments with out a job or a car to get to a job. So, I made the decision to transfer back to my local community college because I can go to school for a fraction of the cost ($43,000/a year vs. aprox $1,000/a semester!) and I had a stable job at Northrop Grumman that I love and can put money away towards transferring back to a four year. 

Honestly, the hardest part about making this decision, despite everything weighing in the favor of moving home, was that so many people I know got caught in the "community college trap" and personally my sister has been at this college for 5 years! Also, for so long I have been wanting to get away from my home life and basically start over and be able to control my own life on my own, and I was clinging to that like crazy because I felt like I had finally gotten out and I desperately didn't want to go back. I had this whole plan in my head of what was going to happen in my life and what I was going to do and from the moment I started having to transition into college believe me that NOTHING went according to that plan. But I learned something very important through all of this: sometimes what is best for us isn't always what we want and we have to learn to accept this and "roll with the punches" and curves thrown at us in life. More times that not in life you are going to have to do something you may not neccessarily want to or is not what you want to do in order to do what is best for you and best for your future. And whether we like it or not life doesn't follow the plan we make for ourselves, it is our job to make the best out of what we are given and work our tails off in order to make a life worth living. Remember make every day worth living! Sending big hugs from my computer screen to yours!

The next step along your journey....

In life change is inevitable. You change jobs, schools, you move to a new location, start a relationship or maybe end one. It is an inescapable truth that things are always changing, nothing is ever static.

When embarking on the next leg of your journey, the road ahead is full of uncertainties. You are stepping out of your comfort zone and fearlessly entering the unknown.

This journey for me: college.

I must admit that I am very nervous and not 100% sure what to expect. I’m worried that I will mess up or let my procrastination get the best of me. I’m sad about not seeing my boyfriend or family every day. I have been crying on and off for days, usually on Johnny’s (Boyfriend) shoulder.

When making changes in your life you wind up thinking about things that you never have before, “how will I do on my own,” “what will it be like living on my own?” The prospect of living on your own at first seems like a grand idea, freedom to do whatever you want. Suddenly the quote from Spiderman comes to mind: “With great power comes great responsibility.” Living on your own is a true test of going from a kid to an adult. It takes a tremendous amount of accountability and responsibility. You no longer have your parents there to stand over your shoulder and tell you to “do your homework”, “do your laundry” or “go to bed so you can wake up on time.”

Some days I can’t stop thinking about if I’m gonna be ok on my own. I have never had my own bedroom and I’m scared of the dark. I am bi-polar and not the best at handling stress or anger. All these things, all the little things you maybe don’t show to anyone but the people who live with you or take care of you on a daily basis. You think, “how the heck do I handle this on my own, and what the heck will my room mate think if I slip up?” The prospect of this is embarrassing.  And I am honestly horrified of slipping up.

However, despite everything, I am going forth to the next leg of my journey and the next chapter of my story. So I will brace myself for a bumpy ride, but who knows, maybe the skies will suddenly clear. I have faith that I can push through, that I can find my balance and my place.

Wish me luck.

And to all those facing your own journeys in life, I wish you all the luck and happiness in the world.

New year, new me!

Ok, so I know it might be a little late to post my "new years resolutions", but my boss reminded me that it's never to late to start fresh. What inspired this? Well I mentioned to my coworker that I used to do yoga and he invited me to a free Sunday morning yoga class at Lululemon. Well to put it bluntly, I realized how out of shape I was haha. So that led to my decision to get my butt in shape! My goal to start is to loose about five pounds, starting with a small goal and working my way forward. (And I will keep updating my blog with my status as a way to keep myself going)

I'm not big on working out for hours and running till I pass out because to be honest I'm kinda lazy and suck at running XD So here's  my plan: I sat down today to download a couple simple workout/fitness apps so that way when I wake up or have a spare moment I can do a 15 minute workout or however long I want. (Workout Trainer, Daily Yoga, Fitness Flow and Nike Training Club)

 Also, I plan to start regularly going to the free yoga class that started this reformation. And finally, the simplest thing is just continuing to go for walks around my neighborhood. I personally love just walking and going at my own pace, I can go and listen to music and think or clear my head. Also, I found out about an amazing hiking trail so maybe I will go check that out and report back!

*Here is a quick tip when you want to make a change in your life: anyone can go all out for just one time for one day and then give up, but what it really takes is doing a little bit at a time repeatedly. So I wish everyone luck with their goals! 

From my wacky world to yours!

I'm back!

Hey blogging world! So I know I kinda went AWOL for a bit, here's what I was up to: 

I experienced extreme stress (and still am) over college applications and now scholarships. I don't think I've ever talked about myself that much! First of all, I hate writing essays to begin with so that was not fun at all. But thankfully they are all submitted and that is such a huge weight off my shoulders...but unfortunately it has been replaced with scholarships. But on the bright side, scholarships mean cheaper college for me :)

I got to go see my family and have a wonderful time on Christmas! My family actually all got along which is an achievement and, in typical Clark fashion, we were completely insane! My aunt always makes the best food and this year we had her famous mash potatoes, ham, spicy chicken and so much more! 

To wrap up the major events, I drove with my aunt up to Pleasanton to visit my cousin Ursula and finally meet my adorable little Christian :) he is such a flirt and has accepted the fact that he is just to cute. I mean seriously, look at this adorable little boy right here: 

 Isn't he adorable? He has such an active personality for being six months (now seven) old. And on top of that, I missed my cousin (Christian's mom) so much, she is more like my sister to me than a cousin. (So much so that I've actually called Christian my nephew a couple times!)  I feel so blessed that I got the opportunity to bond with him and spend a weekend with both Christian and Ursula, it reminded me how important my family is to me.

 Oh, almost forgot! There was one major change while I was up in Pleasanton! *drum roll* 

 That's right I cut my hair! And I decided that I wanted to do something drastic to symbolize how much my life is changing and that I vow to make those changes for the best! I learned a valuable lesson: I can waste my life trying to make everyone else happy but at the end of the day my own happiness is what matters the most. So sometimes I may have to make some difficult choices but in the end I will to what is best for me and leads towards the brightest future.

Have a wonderful day, from my wacky life to yours :)