In life change is inevitable. You change jobs, schools, you
move to a new location, start a relationship or maybe end one. It is an inescapable
truth that things are always changing, nothing is ever static.
When embarking on the next leg of your journey, the road
ahead is full of uncertainties. You are stepping out of your comfort zone and
fearlessly entering the unknown.
This journey for me: college.
I must admit that I am very nervous and not 100% sure what
to expect. I’m worried that I will mess up or let my procrastination get the
best of me. I’m sad about not seeing my boyfriend or family every day. I have
been crying on and off for days, usually on Johnny’s (Boyfriend) shoulder.
When making changes in your life you wind up thinking about
things that you never have before, “how will I do on my own,” “what will it be
like living on my own?” The prospect of living on your own at first seems like
a grand idea, freedom to do whatever you want. Suddenly the quote from
Spiderman comes to mind: “With great power comes great responsibility.” Living
on your own is a true test of going from a kid to an adult. It takes a
tremendous amount of accountability and responsibility. You no longer have your
parents there to stand over your shoulder and tell you to “do your homework”,
“do your laundry” or “go to bed so you can wake up on time.”
Some days I can’t stop thinking about if I’m gonna be ok on
my own. I have never had my own bedroom and I’m scared of the dark. I am
bi-polar and not the best at handling stress or anger. All these things, all
the little things you maybe don’t show to anyone but the people who live with
you or take care of you on a daily basis. You think, “how the heck do I handle
this on my own, and what the heck will my room mate think if I slip up?” The prospect
of this is embarrassing. And I am
honestly horrified of slipping up.
However, despite everything, I am going forth to the next
leg of my journey and the next chapter of my story. So I will brace myself for
a bumpy ride, but who knows, maybe the skies will suddenly clear. I have faith
that I can push through, that I can find my balance and my place.
Wish me luck.
And to all those facing your own journeys in life, I wish
you all the luck and happiness in the world.
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